I’ve lost count of the amount of times I have heard a man describe his wife or partner as ‘crazy’, especially during a break-up. Its a common theme and when he calls you crazy, it can be so damaging to your self esteem.
When women are angry at men, they call them heartless. When men are angry at women, they call them crazy ~Susanna Kaysen.
‘I just couldn’t live with her, She’s bat s**t crazy!’
‘I have no idea what went wrong, She’s lost the plot!’
‘I tried so hard to make her happy, but she’s bloody nuts!’
There are an array of suchlike remarks that I hear used time and time again, usually implying that the problems in the relationship are nothing to do with them, its all her because she is mentally unstable. It is blame shifting, a topic I have covered before. Basically, he doesn’t want to take any responsibility for the break up so he blames her. Now, I’m not saying women never do this, of course they do, but generally it is a ‘man thing’.
Why do men like to call you crazy?
Here are some reasons why.
He blame Shifts
He doesn’t want people thinking bad of him, so they shift the scrutiny onto their partner – ‘How can you possibly expect me to live with a crazy person?’ It was an impossible situation for ‘poor me’. As a result people turn their attention to the actions of deranged ex wife/partner and away from him. He escapes the relationship blame free.
What to do – Stand firm in who you are. you know the ‘real’ reason for the break-up and you know for sure you are not solely to blame. Take responsibility for your part in it and make it clear that it most definitely wasn’t all you.
He wants you to doubt yourself
He is so good at manipulating you that he actually has you believing that you are crazy and the break-up is all your fault. You begin to question where you went wrong and what you could have done to avoid the break-up.
What to do – Never doubt yourself. Ask yourself why exactly he is calling you crazy. Is it because he got caught out? Is he NOT taking any responsibility for his actions? or is he simply angry because you had the audacity to end it? If you really aren’t crazy, then cement it in your mind that this is a common tactic to get their own way.
He is controlling
He has to have complete control of the situation and during a break-up he loses that control. The only way to regain his hold over you, is if he calls you crazy. He will discredit you in order to validate his feelings, making it all about him. This makes the relationship unequal and gives him back his control.
What to do – Take back the control yourself by remaining graceful. Do the opposite to what he is telling people you do. This will discredit him, rather than confirm his accusation. He just wants to put you down.
He Insults You
He wants to insult you because he knows it will really p**s you off. It will get him the attention he wants from you as you thrash it out with him.
What to do – Best thing to do here is be classy and ignore the twat. Don’t argue back with him and resist slagging him off. Don’t add any fuel to the fire.
He is cheating
He tells you that you are crazy when you confront him with his bullshit. C’mon, he is shady as hell and he knows that you know it. He can’t answer your questions and he isn’t ready to get caught just yet, so he convinces you, that you are nuts. He calls you crazy.
What to do – Stand firm. Don’t fall for this very common tactic. A lot of men do this when they have been caught out. It is called ‘gaslighting’.